The Deacon's Bench - August, 2010

How’s your garden coming along? Mine’s doing fine – lots of jalapeño peppers, tomatoes, blueberries and raspberries, potatoes, eggplant and of course, the zucchini. Lots of zucchini. More than enough zucchini. Enough to feed ALL those little kids in India.

One evening last week, while I was picking the 4,297th zucchini from the squash patch, God dropped in.
“How’s the garden, Tim?” God asked.
I suspected he wasn't really looking for information.
“It’s coming along pretty well, God,” I said, “except that I have lots more zucchini than I need.”
“What are you going to do with the excess?” God asked.
“I’ll probably give it away,” I replied. “Would you like some?”
“It’s already mine,” God reminded me with a smile. “I’m sure you’re planning to give it away to people who’ll enjoy it.”
“I will,” I agreed, “I like to give good stuff away to my friends.”
“How about the rest of your excess?” God asked me.
“There’s not an excess of anything else, God,” I said.
“I don’t mean vegetables, Tim” God said.
Somehow I already knew that.
“You want money?” I asked.
God laughed. “Guess again!”
“Prayer time?”
“Nope,” God said, “remember, we’re talking about your excesses here, Tim”
“Oh,” I said, chastened. “What do you mean, then, God?”
“I’ve showered you and your family with an abundance of blessings, Tim,” God said, “have I not?”
“You sure have, God,” I said, “you’ve been very kind.”
“Maybe even excessively kind, the way you earth folks think?”God asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Well, yes” I said, “You’ve been kind to us beyond our dreams.”
“Then why don’t you give some of that excess kindness away along with your excess zucchini?” God suggested.
“Hmm, that might be fun,” I said, warming up to the idea.
“Can you think of anything else which I might’ve showered upon you in excess?” God wondered aloud.
“Sure, God,” I said. “Just about everything! You’ve been so patient with me, and generous and compassionate, and…”
“Think you can give some of that excess away with your zucchini too, Tim?” God asked.
“I get it now God,” I said. “You know, I wasn’t really through, either. You’ve been excessively forgiving, gentle and loving, too. The list goes on and on.”
“Just like the zucchini, Tim?”
“Yes, exactly like the zucchini,” I laughed. “There’s so much!”
“Then give it away, Tim,” God said. “You said you like to give good stuff away to your friends. I do too.”
We stood there for a moment, looking at each other with affection, and I smiled as I thought of all the people who’d be getting not only a zucchini, but now so much more.

Deacon Tim’s Zucchini à la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
1 zucchini, sliced
1 onion, sliced like the zucchini
1 carrot, sliced more or less like the onion and zucchini, but nobody’s looking, so slice it any way you want to
1 jalapeño pepper, minced (then aaagh! don't rub your eyes WASH YOUR HANDS first!!)
1 glob chopped garlic, and a little salt and pepper, too
Fry it all in a big pan with some olive oil, until the zucchini is of a consistency where you wouldn’t mind eating it; then do so.